Jokes...

[hansenderek]

Post your favorite jokes of all time...

and sorry if there is already one of these...i looked and didnt see it

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A college teacher reminds her class of their upcoming final exam.

"Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury, illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that's it. No other excuses whatsoever!"

A clever fellow in the back of the room raises his hand and asks, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete & utter sexual exhaustion?"

The teacher smiles knowingly at the student, shakes her head and sweetly says, "Well, I guess you'd have to write with your other hand."

[cmccmc]

LMFAO

[krypking]

a spanish, asian, white and black guy all go to hell. satan aproaches each one, grabs his penis, and melts it off. when satan gets to the black guy, he grabs his penis but nothing happens. the black guy looks at satan and says, chocolate melts in your mouth, not in your hand

[Unknownforce]

A kid is having trouble sleeping because he hears this pounding noise all night long, after a few restless nights, he finally goes to see what the noise is.

He finds his mom jumping up and down on his dad. He says "Mommy what are you doing to Daddy!?"

His mom, still in the heat of the moment, scrambles to say "Oh well you see, your dad is fat, and I'm jumping up and down on him to make him thin again!"

The kid thinks about it for a minute and says "But mommy, how is that going to work when the lady next door comes over and blows him back up every day!"

[KHRZ]

^How come I never heard such a good one before?!

[Diddy Kong]

(08-28-2009, 06:22 AM)krypking Wrote: a spanish, asian, white and black guy all go to hell. satan aproaches each one, grabs his penis, and melts it off. when satan gets to the black guy, he grabs his penis but nothing happens. the black guy looks at satan and says, chocolate melts in your mouth, not in your hand

If your going to post a Chauvinistic Joke it has to at least be funny..
Otherwise the racism sticks out Inexcusably hardcore.

[Unknownforce]

(08-30-2009, 05:12 AM)Diddy Kong Wrote: If your going to post a Chauvinistic Joke it has to at least be funny..
Otherwise the racism sticks out Inexcusably hardcore.

It's a joke... in the off-topic forum... lighten up.

[Jefferson]

The teacher was talking about the occupations to the class. Mariana:"My father is a plumber. Because he works in the pipes, Jorge:"My mother is baker. Because she bakes breads and cakes.
Pepito:"My mom is sustitute".Teacher:"Dont you mean prostitute?"Pepito:"No. My aunt is the prostitute, my mom is the sustitute.

Well...you know...

[jenniffermichel]

Hi!
My all time favorite joke is here. I hope joke will be liked by you.

First Man: I am so miser that I went alone for my honeymoon and saved half the money.
Second Man: That is nothing, I saved full money. I sent my wife for honeymoon with a friend.